Sleeping and teething don't mix

Sometimes I think that the people who write parenting books have never met a child.  And they certainly cannot be parents.  To the one who wrote that teething should not alter a baby's sleeping schedule, I submit that you are wrong crazy.

Charlie has been doing great on a 2-3-4 schedule.  (Nap 2 hours after wake up, 2nd nap 3 hours after end of 1st nap, bedtime 4 hours after end of 2nd nap, give or take a half hour.)  She rarely fussed when put down for her naps, and almost never at night. 

Enter teething (thunder crashes, scary music plays).

Somewhere in my sweet baby's mouth, hundreds of teeth are trying to get through.  At least, that's what it seems like.  We can't see any yet, but the shape of her gums are constantly in flux as, at the very least, the middle top two try to force their way out.  Two nights ago she woke an hour after going down for the night, screaming.  She fell asleep as soon as we took her out, but woke every time we laid her back down, resulting in a terrible nights co-sleep session.  That girl takes up at least 3/4 of the bed.  I was literally half on/half off the bed for a good portion of the night.  I attempted twice to put her back in her crib in the middle of the night, to no avail. 

Yesterday naps were hard to come by.  The first one was a fight, and when she did fall asleep, she was out longer than normal, I think because no one slept well the night before, including the bed hog herself.  The second one was a full on battle, and the stubborn girl simply sat up in her crib for an entire hour, waiting until my resolve broke. 

Again, I put her down for bedtime, and an hour later she was screaming like she was on fire.  We've heard that cry a few times: when she gets her shots, and when she has painful bowel movements.  It took a long time to calm her down and coax her in to taking baby acetaminophen.  We got her down again, but she soon woke screaming, and we brought her into our room while we read before bed.  She promptly fell asleep and was successfully moved to her crib before Tim went to sleep.  At about 5 am she scared Tim awake with a scream - one short scream - and he ran in there to find her sound asleep, but hitting her head repeatedly on the crib slats.  He moved her a safe distance from the slats, and she woke up wailing.  Back in to our bed, where I was able to calm her and snuggle her to sleep again.  She slept, with a few interruptions to cry a bit, until 9 am. 

Now, here we are, two hours later, and I'm listening to my fed, changed, sleepy child scream herself silly from her crib.  Please Teeth, I am begging you...stop dragging your feet (roots?) and just come out already.  It's been long enough.